May 2010
May 31st
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May 30th
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May 29th
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May 29th
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May 29th
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May 29th
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May 29th
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May 29th
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May 29th
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dissentience: Mark Kermode reviews Sex And The City 2 part 1 | part 2 Such an enjoyable rant! Made brilliant by the “I’m not going to rant” preface, sings The Internationale, shouts “Imperialist American pigdogs!”. Have a listen if you’ve got nowt else to do this morning. Love you guys x Mark Kermode is one of my many spirit animals.
May 29th
May 28th
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May 28th
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May 28th
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The Onion: New Social Networking Site Changing The... →
May 27th
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May 27th
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May 26th
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Facebook's Richest App, FarmVille, Goes To Yahoo →
Zynga games are coming to Yahoo, the two companies announced this morning. From now on, you’ll be able to play FarmVille through Yahoo, not just Facebook. According to the release, as you progress in your game on Yahoo, updates appear elsewhere in your Zynga games.
May 26th
4 notes
“Mario dies, too, but when he dies, everything stops and you start over. It’s...”
– What I’m Playing: Yoshi’s more of a concept, really The phrase “happy veal car” alone made this worth reading.  
May 26th
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May 26th
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May 25th
3,931 notes
May 24th
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May 24th
16 notes
2 tags
"For Jane", by Charles Bukowski
225 days under grass and you know more than I. they have long taken your blood, you are a dry stick in a basket. is this how it works? in this room the hours of love  still make shadows. when you left you took almost everything. I kneel in the nights  before tigers that will not let me be. what you were  will not happen again. the tigers have found me and I do not care.
May 23rd
21 notes
1 tag
And then we sat there, wonderful
“You’re out of my league.” “You’re out of my league.” “That’s not true.” “‘Tis.” “…” “…” “…fuck ‘em. Let’s start our own league.” “Ha. What’re we going to call it?” “I don’t know. Nothing. It’ll just end up being a label they...
May 22nd
35 notes
May 22nd
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“He said that people who loved [animals] to excess were capable of the worst...”
– From “Love in the Time of Cholera” by Gabriel García Márquez (which I’ve just started reading). The event sequence when reading this paragraph was: laugh love this book a little think of Jason
May 21st
19 notes
May 21st
16 notes
May 21st
26 notes
1 tag
May 20th
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Supercook: recipe search by ingredients →
Find recipes by giving in the list of ingredients you have. What a great idea.
May 20th
114 notes
1 tag
May 19th
33 notes
May 19th
174 notes
The 21st century is slowly warping the word ‘introvert’ to mean ‘someone who belongs to fewer than 5 social networking sites’.
May 18th
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May 18th
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Imaginary Conversations with American Apparel... →
May 17th
6 notes
1 tag
Uncomfortably minty
I left my toothbrush somewhere when I was on holiday. Back at home, I found an old one I could use in the cupboard in my bathroom. “I probably should have disinfected that before I used it,” I thought afterwards, as I lay in the dark. Then mostly I just lay there in the dark, awake. So terribly, terribly awake.
May 16th
38 notes
‘Fringe’ is the nicotine-patch equivalent of X-Files. Still, I’m enjoying it.
May 16th
7 notes
The Voices In My Head
Voice 1: Hey. Hey. You know that old meme thing about the bananaphone? Voice 2: Don’t mention it. DON’T. Voice 3 (immediately begins singing): ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, bananaphoone…  Voice 2: Oh great. So now that’s going to be happening for the next two hours. Voice 1: Yeah, great, listen: I have an idea. Voice 3: ring ring ring ring ring ring ring,...
May 15th
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May 15th
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May 15th
3 notes
1 tag
“That guy? That guy is fucken useless. That guy should’ve been a blowjob.”
– My father
May 12th
33 notes
2 tags
The young Scotsman
More than anything, I think, my dad likes telling stories. He loves sitting around a fire and expounding on some tale that he found funny or some story he found to be agree with his philosophy. His most recent story was about a group of people he’d led on an off-road motor-bike tour of part of South Africa. Specifically, this story was about a young Scotsman who was one of the participants...
May 11th
27 notes
“You seen K—— recently? He still alive?” “Yes, Bahdah. We’re staying with him.” We couldn’t say Grandpa as kids. The nickname stuck. He’s talking about our father, but for the moment it seems he’s forgotten that we’re K——‘s sons. He forgets a lot of things now. “That K——, his problem was always...
May 9th
23 notes
May 9th
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My Family (Scene 3, Act II)
Me: It looks like it’ll be a hung parliament. Brother: I’ll show them a hung parliament. <gestures at crotch> (SCENE ENDS. EXEUNT OMNES.)
May 7th
27 notes
2 tags
Front Toward Enemy
His newest game is to hide pornography where he knows I’ll find it. It started, I think, when I accidentally unearthed one of his hidden caches. My surprise and indignation were foolishly vocalised, I realise in retrospect. I should have known he’d simply smile, his eyes twinkling, and formulate some new game to play. So now I find unexpected pornography wherever I turn - in my...
May 6th
35 notes
Brother: Am I dressed smart enough for this restaurant? Dad: Yes. Brother: Are you sure? It’s quite a smart restaurant. Dad: Yes, you look very smart. You almost look like a gay man.
May 5th
31 notes
Joking. He's joking. I think.
Dad: So, while you’re here, do you mind fixing my computer? Me: Sure, dad. Dad: Great. Also, could you put some really nice hardcore porn on it as well? Me: Sure, dad. Dad: Just girls, hey? I like ‘em fat and hairy. Me: Sure. Dad: No boys. I don’t like boys. Me: Sure. Dad: Well, maybe some boys. You never know, hey? I might change my mind. Fat and hairy. Me: Sure.
May 5th
45 notes
1 tag
“The world’s going to end in 2012. Seriously: your best bet is to go stick...”
– My dad
May 4th
32 notes
April 2010
Going away for two weeks. Will hopefully be without internet. Stay sound, boys and girls.
Apr 30th
15 notes