dissentience: Mark Kermode reviews Sex And The City 2 part 1 | part 2 Such an enjoyable rant! Made brilliant by the “I’m not going to rant” preface, sings The Internationale, shouts “Imperialist American pigdogs!”. Have a listen if you’ve got nowt else to do this morning. Love you guys x Mark Kermode is one of my many spirit animals.
The Onion: New Social Networking Site Changing The... →
Facebook's Richest App, FarmVille, Goes To Yahoo →
Zynga games are coming to Yahoo, the two companies announced this morning. From now on, you’ll be able to play FarmVille through Yahoo, not just Facebook. According to the release, as you progress in your game on Yahoo, updates appear elsewhere in your Zynga games.
Mario dies, too, but when he dies, everything stops and you start over. It’s...– What I’m Playing: Yoshi’s more of a concept, really The phrase “happy veal car” alone made this worth reading.
"For Jane", by Charles Bukowski
225 days under grass and you know more than I. they have long taken your blood, you are a dry stick in a basket. is this how it works? in this room the hours of love still make shadows. when you left you took almost everything. I kneel in the nights before tigers that will not let me be. what you were will not happen again. the tigers have found me and I do not care.
And then we sat there, wonderful
“You’re out of my league.” “You’re out of my league.” “That’s not true.” “‘Tis.” “…” “…” “…fuck ‘em. Let’s start our own league.” “Ha. What’re we going to call it?” “I don’t know. Nothing. It’ll just end up being a label they...
He said that people who loved [animals] to excess were capable of the worst...– From “Love in the Time of Cholera” by Gabriel García Márquez (which I’ve just started reading). The event sequence when reading this paragraph was: laugh love this book a little think of Jason
Supercook: recipe search by ingredients →
Find recipes by giving in the list of ingredients you have. What a great idea.
The 21st century is slowly warping the word ‘introvert’ to mean ‘someone who belongs to fewer than 5 social networking sites’.
Imaginary Conversations with American Apparel... →
I left my toothbrush somewhere when I was on holiday. Back at home, I found an old one I could use in the cupboard in my bathroom. “I probably should have disinfected that before I used it,” I thought afterwards, as I lay in the dark. Then mostly I just lay there in the dark, awake. So terribly, terribly awake.
‘Fringe’ is the nicotine-patch equivalent of X-Files. Still, I’m enjoying it.
The Voices In My Head
Voice 1: Hey. Hey. You know that old meme thing about the bananaphone? Voice 2: Don’t mention it. DON’T. Voice 3 (immediately begins singing): ring ring ring ring ring ring ring, bananaphoone… Voice 2: Oh great. So now that’s going to be happening for the next two hours. Voice 1: Yeah, great, listen: I have an idea. Voice 3: ring ring ring ring ring ring ring,...
That guy? That guy is fucken useless. That guy should’ve been a blowjob.– My father
The young Scotsman
More than anything, I think, my dad likes telling stories. He loves sitting around a fire and expounding on some tale that he found funny or some story he found to be agree with his philosophy. His most recent story was about a group of people he’d led on an off-road motor-bike tour of part of South Africa. Specifically, this story was about a young Scotsman who was one of the participants...
“You seen K—— recently? He still alive?” “Yes, Bahdah. We’re staying with him.” We couldn’t say Grandpa as kids. The nickname stuck. He’s talking about our father, but for the moment it seems he’s forgotten that we’re K——‘s sons. He forgets a lot of things now. “That K——, his problem was always...
My Family (Scene 3, Act II)
Me: It looks like it’ll be a hung parliament. Brother: I’ll show them a hung parliament. <gestures at crotch> (SCENE ENDS. EXEUNT OMNES.)
Front Toward Enemy
His newest game is to hide pornography where he knows I’ll find it. It started, I think, when I accidentally unearthed one of his hidden caches. My surprise and indignation were foolishly vocalised, I realise in retrospect. I should have known he’d simply smile, his eyes twinkling, and formulate some new game to play. So now I find unexpected pornography wherever I turn - in my...
Brother: Am I dressed smart enough for this restaurant? Dad: Yes. Brother: Are you sure? It’s quite a smart restaurant. Dad: Yes, you look very smart. You almost look like a gay man.
Joking. He's joking. I think.
Dad: So, while you’re here, do you mind fixing my computer? Me: Sure, dad. Dad: Great. Also, could you put some really nice hardcore porn on it as well? Me: Sure, dad. Dad: Just girls, hey? I like ‘em fat and hairy. Me: Sure. Dad: No boys. I don’t like boys. Me: Sure. Dad: Well, maybe some boys. You never know, hey? I might change my mind. Fat and hairy. Me: Sure.
The world’s going to end in 2012. Seriously: your best bet is to go stick...– My dad
Going away for two weeks. Will hopefully be without internet. Stay sound, boys and girls.